Monday, 11 November 2013

Beauty is only skin deep

I heard a news article on the radio this morning, saying that a man was suing his wife for giving birth to an ugly child.

Wow, lawyers could get 'pretty' busy couldn't they!

How can you swing that one, because beauty is,as they say, in the eye of the beholder. Will they ask for a vote when it gets to court:  'All those who think this child didn't fall too far from the ugly tree, please raise your hand.' 

They say that people of similar attractiveness end up together, don't they. Hence why we have the expression 'punching below/above his/her weight' because for the most part couples tend to be on a par looks wise, so it becomes a point of discussion when they aren't.

So one would think in the instance of this husband suing his wife, it would be as much his fault as hers.  Well, therein lies the story - because the wife had undergone £1000's worth of plastic surgery to take her from an Ugly Betty to a Gorgeous Giselle, but had neglected to tell her now husband.

Can you hear the conversation in the delivery room.  It's a girl!  Daddy takes one looks at her and baulks.
"What the...... Honey I think you should have had a cesarian because this baby is pretty messed up." 'Man that is one ugly f*cker' he thinks to himself. 
"All babies look like Winston Churchill when they are born." she assured him.
Days turn into weeks and weeks into months and he patiently waits for 'Winnie' as she is now known, to grow into her face...
The christening is an occasions full of cringes with comments such as:
"Gosh she looks just like Winston Churchill."
"Oh my, she really takes you related to Winston Churchill?"
" I just know she will grow up to have a great personality."

Eventually he accepts that this is not an ugly duckling story with a happy ending and demands to see his wife's family photos.  When he eventually meets his mother in law all his questions are answered by her face and within the pages of the family album that she proudly shows him.

# duped

So be warned, if you marry Brad Pitt you may give birth to John Malkovich!

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